Friday 20 June
To our dear little
boy, Gabriel,(aka Babacino Crispi! ) Written by your Mummy
Today, a year ago,
it was exactly ONE week until you were born.
It was the end of the week, and I was
just finishing work, that made you 39
weeks ‘almost’ old! You were born the following Friday at exactly 9.27 at
night, after precisely 40 weeks worth of wriggly somersaulting and trying to
explore my rib cage every morning before work (which in hind-site, I can only presume you were doing - based on your current devotion to exploring every possible nook and cranny you can find, the more hidden the better!) , and then us getting to know each other in a kind of
unexplainable way. Perhaps only pictures, or dancing, or music could get even close to describing that most amazing journey, that I feel so privileged to have gone on. You and me totally together for 9 months solid, exactly! (as it turns out) . I used to sometimes wish your Papino could have a go to see what it was like! but he was with you too, 100%!
I loved every single day of
our time together. Your Papino used to always ask me, from Italy, what is the
Beetle doing now? And I would tell him how much you were eating, how much you
were wriggling, when I thought you might be sleeping, and I’d play the ’ Il Piccolo
Principe’ CD, from your Papino to you (well
to us! ) every morning before work.
Almost straight
away, I decided that you were my very own little surprise ‘Beetle’ (sort of like a scarab beetle) in my tummy, and
Papino’s too, of course, just not in his tummy! And you were known to the world as Beetle.
The day you were born, after not not
such a long time of that funny word ‘labour’ , perhaps a few hours, you finally arrived, and jumped
right into your Papino’s arms. (I wrote about all that stuff here> The start of the Birth Story of Gabriel, you can read
it if you like, its not all yuk, I promise!). Anyway, as I was saying, I could see you peeking out with your little
glowing brown eyes that everyone has come to love, and a shock of dark hair, already wriggling
and being a Munka Punka! Your Papino was with us all the time, in the hours
before you arrived, as steadfast as a big big baobab tree. And, your granny from SA was there too. Your
Granny is one of your biggest fans in the world!
As soon as you
arrived, I knew that you were Gabriel ,
it felt perfect. You were one resolute little fighter, but also a tiny soft
beautiful little soul who’d already made his mark in the world and in our lives in countless
ways, and THAT in itself is an important wonderful
story for another time!.. As it happens, while you were still our Beetle,
me and your Papino had each thought of an idea for a name to give to you, for when you arrived, because of course we couldn’t always call you Beetle! Your Papino thinking away while in Italy, and me ‘lo steso’ while in London. We had no idea that we were in fact ,
at the same time, thinking of the very same name - Gabriel!! Although, for me, it had always been a name I
loved and something I saved in my heart, for – just in case - one day! And that ‘One Day’ arrived on Friday the 28th
of June 2013, and brought us Gabriel Babacino Crispi!!
I still often wake
up, with you right next to me in your little cot, and your Papino on the other
side and it feels like a dream. Then I hear your little voice and I’m filled
with joy and delight and it feels grounded and peaceful and wonderful to wake up so happy, knowing that you and your Papino are there, again,
just like yesterday and just like the day before.
Nowadays, most
days, when I wake up, what I see exactly, is a little scritcholo, (thats you!) standing up all by himself, in his little sleeping
gro-bag (or not, with the weather so warm at your birthday time of year) holding onto the rail peeking
out over the top with the biggest cheekiest grin ever. And you do look the
picture of cuteness especially with your golden wispy sticky-uppy-hair. As soon as we look at each other, your little
smile lights up your whole face, and you immediately fall down and I say “Oh dear, Boommm!” and we both laugh. And Then you clap your hands with glee, and
we say Bati La Mani Bati La Mani, bravo bravo Babacino Bravo! And then if I
haven’t remembered to move your cot far enough away from the shelf, your little
hands reach out trying to open all the draws and grab any objects, books
especially, that you can lay your hands on. And we have a little game about
cheekiness!!
And then, it’s time
for ‘a nice new nappy’ and ‘our day clothes’! This definitely involves a LOT of
cheekiness. As soon as you’re” tutto nudo!” you race up to the top of the bed
laughing your little head off, and I have to go and chase you and pull you back
by your feet and make sure you don’t jump onto the floor! Then, you are “Monello Monello Cheeky Monkey” and sometimes “Macaroniedo!” ,
and I think you feel most proud of your cleverness at this time!
Eventually we get you into your day clothes
followed by lots more hugs and kisses and your chatter box mummy talking
probably the biggest lot of nonsense on earth, with Babacino following closely with
increasing chattering by the day, if I may say so myself! Your favourite sound at the moment Is daidaiii
daidaiiii, and you wave your little hands in the air, doing some kind of finger
acrobatics, often followed by more clapping. Perhaps one day, you will become a music
conductor or a mime artist, or a wave the aeroplanes into the runway with the
big coloured paddles.
By that time, when
you’re all dressed and ready for your day with your Papino, your Papino has actually been awake for a few
hours already, squirrelling away in his den, writing stories, collecting
delicious morsels of information or reading his myriad of books positioned
around the flat, on a great variety surfaces. “Happy Banana!” we say, “Happy banana, happy
banana” (and that is another story all together, for another another time, how “happy
banana” came about! Although, I think maybe your Papi has written the Happy
Banana story already, we shall have to look at his internet story book and see!) .. followed by family hugs and cups of tea for the Mummy
and the Papi.
If it’s a work day, which most days are, and it’s still early enough,
which usually it is, then we have some
time to play before the Mummy has to go to work. This often involves you
turning into a real live cheeky little monkey, again, crawling as fast as you can into whatever
space you can find, that is not in the middle of the room. Your preference in
these matters is to go under chairs under tables, through the easel and your favourite,
onto the little balcony to stare at the
world, including through the wooden floor boards to the balconies below.
Naturally, like any little cheeky monkey you are also on the lookout at all
times for things to put in your mouth and that is a full time occupation and
mystery in itself!
Because
we’re talking about the morning, I’ll explain a little bit about you and your
Papino. Your Papino has the very
important and best job in the world, he looks after you all day, while I go to
work. In the morning, maybe because I look
after you in the night time, the minute you see your Papino, when we do the
Happy Banana Happy Banana bit, your face is filled with anticipation, and your
little legs start wriggling and squirming and your little arms shoot out and grab onto him, like a little koala bear.
Sometimes he hides away and you can hear
him but not see him, you peer into his
‘office’ ( the far side of the dining room table ) looking for him. “Dove Papino? Dove?”
and you look even harder. No matter what time of day, or how many times you see
your Papino, you always react in the same way, so thrilled and delighted to see
him. I think you absolutely adore your Papino. I feel such pride to see such a
natural wonderful bond between you two. I try to wish and believe the memory
into your bones and your heart (and mine too!). Though, I am sure, it is
happening very well all by itself.
I am
writing this, because I wanted to write you a little letter , (which is turning out to be
not so little) before you turn one, and
while I remember the details and little things of how you were when you were
nearly one. And then one day, if you ask
me ‘what was I like when I was a baby?”, I’ll look into my heart and tell you
all the feelings I remember and all the little things I can recall about you,
and I’ll have a little box of saved up things to show you, and for you to keep.
But, I wanted to write it down too, so that I don’t miss things and so that you
can read it and hopefully you’ll know, how much you were and are cherished and how
every single moment with you, even when you are sleeping is a privilege and a joy.
So,
what are you like? Well, you have quite
a dark skin, it is very Mediterranean I
think. A lot of people say you look like
your Papino because of your dark skin and your deep brown eyes. I like that,
that you look like your Papino. I think its ok that you don’t really look like
me, because I think we share some kinds of feelings, and responses to the world.
We take our time to get to know people, we don’t like big loud noises, we wake
up easily from sounds, we both love hugs and kisses and affection, and we love
to be bare foot with sunshine on our skin. We love to watch hanging mobiles and
light falling on different things , AND we both love bananas and yoghurt and
anything sweet!! And most of all we both love your Papino and my Mauri to
pieces! That’s a good start, don’t you think?
But also, you are different, and your own
little person. Every day with you is a surprise. You’ve just started
giving your toys to your Papino. I think
it shows how much you love him. I think you are learning how to be, from your
Papino!
You
love things that roll or turn, and balls
especially soccer balls. You can spot a game of football, from a mile
off. Your little legs go crazy and you start squealing. We’ll have to try you
out at ‘Little Kickers’ as soon as you can run! You love dogs too, any kind of
dog, even big giant sheep dogs. You can see them or spot them in the biggest
crowd, and you crane your little neck as far as it can go to keep watching the
dog. I think you are wishing it to come and say hello to you! And that reminds me, you're also really affectionate, which I am so happy about and love about you. I hope you stay that way! I don’t know yet if that is your personality, or if its because we've always made a point of carrying you close to us in a sling, when you were tiny, and having lots and lots of family hugs and kisses, which a kid, or a grown-up for that matter, can NEVER have too many of! I hope that you can be comfortable being you, being Babacino, and that starts with the basics, authentic human contact, and that’s what affection is all about! I shall have to write about that some more.. its a great topic Babacino, and of course it is very Italian, so tutto posto!!
In
Palermo, a few weeks ago when we went to visit, we think, that you had learned your
first word, which was “da” which we kind of figured might be short for Frida (Frida is your Papino’s dog in Palermo. She is quite
old now, she knew Franci when he was little too!)
. Even now, when we say “Frida” you look around for her, and when you cant see
her, your little face looks a bit forlorn. Somewhere or somehow you remember
something to do with Frida. I think you are already making attachments and connections
You’ll
quite happily crawl at the speed of sound right across Tata’s house back and
forth chasing Frida just for the possibility of
being able to touch her fur. When you do manage to get near to her, like
in Tatas car, we have to say “piano piano, careful careful” and show you how to
stroke Frida without wanting to pull half her hair out in excitement and affection.
And now
it’s Sunday the 29th of June, the day after your birthday, you’re fast asleep in your little rocking
chair next to your Papino who is fast asleep with his book on his head! We've
been out for a nice long walk with Tata, looking at boats, stopping to play on the
swings and the see-saw and the slides, stopping for coffee and we even stopped
on a little beach on the side of the Thames, and your Papino made a video!
Already when I read back on what I wrote a week ago, you’ve changed. Now you
reach up and practice your standing all over the house, you’re getting excellent
at standing and your Papino tells me you even walked from one side of the table
to the other all by yourself when I was at work!
Yesterday we had a party for you, with balloons and
everything. I think you loved the balloons the most, AND of course some sneaky tastes
of ice-cream. I think you were quite fascinated by all these mad
grown-ups singing a funny song and all staring at you, and then your Papino blew
out the candles of your cake. Gabriel Babacino , I must confess, I did really try to
make you a cake for your birthday, I wanted to make you something with my
hands. But I never quite managed, I tried 3 times! Next year will be better! I have a whole year
to practice. I always want there to be something made with our hands when we have family celebrations, and even just any time, its important, its about care, and creativity and connection and giving and its about communication and stories and making beautiful memories out of every day life. (End of Lecture!)
Zio Tata came all the way from Italy to your party!! It was such fun!! And Kaelin
and Kyle had icecream in South Africa for you, and Dindsy sent us the pictures, one
day we’ll have to invite them, with your granny to your party!
What else
can I tell you Babacino? Well since I started writing this little letter to you, I have
realised that if I were to write down all the things about you on that month or
that week or even that day, you change and develop so fast, and you are so full
of surprises all the time, that I would never finish writing it down, or wanting to tell you everything! So maybe I’ll
just write you more letters over time, and tell you little things as we go. I suppose what
I can say, which doesn’t change, is that without a doubt, me and your Papino
love you soooooooo much, and every day we love you even more, and every day I
realise that it IS possible to love what you think you love the most, even
more! I hope that is how our family will stay, for ever!
Oh, I
forgot, I have to mention dancing! You love to bop around to music, I think its
partly a baby thing, but for me, its definitely a Gabriel thing too. When you hear
music, you start bouncing and bopping your head, your whole little body reacts
to music. There are certain CDs you like the most at the moment, like ‘Sette
veli intorno al re’. The first song has children singing, and you love it and bounce
around an extra amount! And the other one you love is “The Original Motion
Picture Soundtrack to Mandela Long Walk to Freedom’ That you love!! One from
your mummys country and one from your Papino’s country I’ll keep them for you!!
Lots of
love and Happy Banana Happy Banana Buon Compliano Babacino! We Love you
Gabriel, from Mummy and Papino xx
And here are some pictures, well a LOT of pictures, I can never choose just a few, its impossible!! They are from just before your birthday, your first birthday! and just after. They’re in a bit of a funny order too... but I hope you like them Babacino!! They are all about you and our family!! (Except that we would have loved Kaelin and Kyle and Dindsy to be here, but they are far far away in Africa, but we'll visit them again one day or they can visit us!! but there are pictures here of them eating ice-cream for you, in the middle of winter in SA, they’re the pictures right at the end)
So, I'm going to end this now, its already way past your birthday time! I better start collecting again for my next letter! Watch this space, oh Babacino followers!! xxx lots of love Babacino's Mummy!
